21 Comments
User's avatar
Jean Melvin's avatar

I'm in control of other people's driving. They drive too slow ahead of me, I tell em. They don't use their turn signal, I tell em. I even inform them of their level of intelligence. It's unsatisfactory. They don't learn from my wisdom.

Mark Rothschild's avatar

Jean, that truly made me laugh out loud. Keep trying!

catherine ayres's avatar

I ask all kind of questions to a upcoming situation so I’m not surprised by anything? How do you think that works for me?🧐😆. I use to think I went with the flow but gosh was I 😑 wrong.

Loved your memory.

Mark Rothschild's avatar

That's so good and so true. We just want to know...

Pattie Leonardis's avatar

What a lovely tribute to your Dad.

Doug's avatar

Made me consider how religion and routine interact. Maybe freedom is being able to choose your routine versus having it prescribed. Do values come from routine or does routine come from values? Both provide a moment of choice. Costumes and looks are definitely an inherited trait from your mom!

Kate Burk's avatar

Re: Your father's comment asking whether you were being paid to wear the shirt...my thots exactly. Could never bring myself to do that for any company. I broke pledge when I bought a shirt to support a feline receiving cancer treatment.Think I've worn it 3 times in public & it was due to a couple cooler winters. Long sleeves & FL isn't all that common for me.

Anne Henschel's avatar

Two weeks ago I had to have a large kidney stone removed. I knew about the pending procedure for three weeks before. I drove my wife insane with my worry. I was definitely not in my "controlled" place. 76 yrs old and I was a mess - and embarrassed as hell. I hope it's a lesson well learned... Even at this stage of life!

Elissa Morganteelissa Morgante's avatar

Oops, it sent too fast…

I try to focus on the small wins, like having good doctors, and a clear protocol. The small things like what to wear or small talk fall the wayside.

Elissa Morganteelissa Morgante's avatar

That is a very tough question Mark. When big things, like my health are out of control, I tend to focus

Kc ford's avatar

I enjoy your essays, and this one caused me pause. I like to have control over my schedule, something I have never thought about until today( I am almost 82 years old, I believe this is a recent belief)😳

Susan's avatar

I love the story. It is good to have our memories

Jay Hankins's avatar

When I was single after the divorce I had a desire to be witty. I enjoyed conversation with people who could banter quickly. I bought a book on “how to be witty.”

I wonder what happened to that book and I decided i liked being serious and mysterious.

As I got older it was brought to my attention how witty and funny I was!

Did that happen gradually over time?

There is nothing I have control over except my reaction to not being in control.

Vivzk's avatar

This question made me think, only because I feel the world we live in is really out of control. I had to figure out what it is I am able to control. Other than the need to rebuild gardens in my front yard at 2 hours a day (I live in south Louisiana) where the temperature and humidity control a lot of what is done outside here), I think I take control in the kitchen. I like to cook. It is truly my domain. I love finding new recipes, or I google recipes for those foods I currently have in the house and try new dishes. It also doesn't require much interaction with the rest of the world, other than grocery shopping, and that is something I have to do myself. No DoorDash for that.

Martha K Backer's avatar

Really love your style. Story is one of my nightmares. I have friends who shop together and have the “right “ look. Woke up this morning and they were making fun of my wrinkled pants.

Mary Grogan's avatar

Quite sublime

John Charles Harman's avatar

Sort of interesting. After I became incredibly rich (just say i won the lottery) Everyone I know, including family, that I talked to I smiled and told them, “I know you called me an asshole behind my back. It’s OK, I am fine with that. But now you need to call me a rich asshole!

Mindy Blatchford's avatar

picking out a pair of earrings and wearing them